Dating a Disabled Person

graffiti-1088873_960_720[Image from http://bit.ly/29ON77d]

You’ve met someone. You think they are pretty awesome, and attractive. It just so happens that they have a disability. Now you might start thinking, oh this could complicate things like future plans, maybe raising a child, or climbing mountains for a living. How can someone who may need help in day to day life help me raise a child, or do other things to get our life in order? How will we have sex, am I going to be doing all the sweaty work? Our brains go on autopilot asking all kinds of questions to ourselves when someone or something new comes along. You probably never dated a disabled person before, so these questions are especially unique. These questions may form into anxieties or reasons that hold you back from considering this person as a potential mate. Here is the important thing: Ignore your impulse to run from this opportunity. These questions are normal, and you can ask them when you both feel comfortable. The point being: none of these anxieties should prevent you and your disabled mate from going out to dinner, or a nice show. Some events may have logistical challenges for accessibility, but your disabled partner will usually be forthcoming with you about access issues, because, as a disabled person, showing up to some event you can’t access or participate in is more embarrassing than talking about logistics beforehand. The more acquainted you become with each other, the more clear access and independence issues become, and you’ll learn that there are plenty of solutions. Disabled people work, travel, eat, play, and worship. We are very creative individuals, constantly coming up with new ideas that allow us to live in a well-balanced way. The salient point is: Just do it, all relationships carry a balance of risk versus reward. Ask your disabled friend out on a date; If they agree, enjoy your time. If they “reject” you, that’s their right, as it is yours. If you have any stories or insights regarding disability and dating, please comment.

Man in Wheelchair Shocked to learn He is Disabled

Inspired by the style of ‘The Onion’.

 

 

On Saturday March 1st Fred McGimp woke up to start a typical day. This time, however, he woke to a startling realization. McGimp spoke to a reporter from his local hometown in Florida. He told Channel 9 News:

 

It was like any other day, always waking up with that damn back pain. But once out of bed, I rolled up to my mirror as usual for the morning sexiness check, only this time I froze. Like some shocking epiphany or something, sitting in front of the mirror, I thought to myself, could I be disabled?? I hurried over to my computer. I logged on to WebMD to see if I could find symptoms of being disabled. What I found next was shocking. It said that disabled people have a wide range of symptoms, including trouble using arms or legs, and many cannot even walk.

 

I knew that I could use my arms and legs but I wanted to makesure I could walk, because I had already registered for the Orlando 5k Marathon. So I did the first thing anyone would do. I typed ¬†‘How To Walk’ into Youtube. I saw three year olds doing this walking thing, I broke the process down using my legal pad. I also created a reverse algorithm using recursion. Now, all that was left was to try it. I got up, I fell down, and then I could not figure out how to get up, and I couldn’t reach Youtube. I called the police, told them the story and now you’re here.

 

Yes, Mr. McGimp, the Sherrif’s Office called us, said there is a breaking story. So Mr. McGimp, how has your life changed since this shocking realization?

 

Well, the past three hours have certainly been reflective. It is going to be difficult on my new passion to be a long distance runner…but for some reason, all of my life, I’ve been quite used to sitting, so I figure how hard can this disabled thing really be.

 

Mr. McGimp, now that you look back on years past, in retrospect, was there anything that should have indicated that you have this disability?

Well, I suppose this explains my aversion to dancing, or all those times that I failed at using wall urinals, or that time I tried to propose to Madonna but fell down instead of going on my knees. I think it was lucky that the proposal failed, actually. Has she been a lesbian for some time now? I can’t remember.

 

What would you like to say to others who may be experiencing the same realization?

At first accepting a reality like this can be difficult, but if you give it some time, you’ll get used to it, and you can overcome challenges, just like me, laying on this carpet for three hours. At first, the carpet tasted kind of funny, but then I realized it has more of a salty flavor, and mixed with saliva, it kind of tastes like a salty soft rice-cake, but three hours is good enough, I think I should get up soon.

 

Thank you for your time, Mr. McGimp.

 

Hey wait…..

 

 

Sounds like Channel 9 left too quickly, lets hope he didn’t need help reaching Youtube.